The little things...

As I'm getting ready to make a bunch of posts from April and May it has occurred to me, it's always the little things, the stolen moments, the daily life that doesn't always scream out at the moment, the time with friends/family that matter the most. Life is definitely made up of moments, and our life is so blessed. I am so blessed, as a daughter, woman, friend, wife, mommy.

I had no idea what it would be like to be a mom. I remember talking with Abby one day, I'm fairly sure I was VERY pregnant, I was at the movie store. There was a child there, and the voice of the child was making my skin crawl. I know that sounds terrible, just think of how bad I felt!!! I was soon to meet my baby, to raise a child and all I wanted to do was scream or run out of the store. Instead I called Abby, confessed my concerns... and heard the most comforting words. I can't remember them exactly, but I know she showed empathy and gave me encouragement. I know now, that yes, there might be those days when your own child makes you want to go back to bed... but it's NOTHING in comparison to how much love they bring into your life.


Yesterday as we were getting out of the car Nathan got out first and came over to open up my door. I was gathering the bags full of random stuff up (every once in a while I try to pretend that I can have a clean car), he said "here Mommy, I'll open your door". It brought me into the moment, I said "oh my, Nathan you are such a gentlemen!" I'm so glad I was present enough to give him a complement. He just BEAMED. So proud that he had hit the mark. He quickly asked me to give him my bag so he could carry it, then walked me into the house and reiterated that he was indeed a gentlemen. And tonight, as I was cuddling with him at bedtime, I said "goodnight my sweet boy", he responded "goodnight my sweet mom". There are times when it's nice to hear your own words repeated. If I haven't mentioned it a million times, he melts my heart. And all of this while he has been so sick.

Speaking of sick, all three of us have been sick for over a week. Normally I would not see this as a blessing. Although it was very tough to be sick at the same time as the kids, (I could be overheard once or twice saying "listen kids, I've worked really hard to take care of you and be nice while you're sick... now I'm sick and you need to be nice to me too!") having a week of nothing was quite wonderful. We didn't even leave the house for a day or two. Then I left the house without the kids... and my car broke down. A blessing in itself (that I didn't have the kids with me, and that I have fabulous insurance).


We've spent a lot of time reading, watching movies, playing outside. The timing has been perfect. Natalie decided to potty train. I wish I could remember exactly how it started. I know there were many days where she sat on her potty for HOURS. She would grab her tush and say "poo poo potty!", then she would sit, and sit, and sit. Give it enough time and you are bound to find success (let's hope she can remember this in the future). You probably think I'm exagerating, but I'm not. Ask my cousin Jenna, each time she came over Natalie was on the potty. She would sit on it and scoot it around the house... I can't believe these details are now memories! How quickly things progress, it's only been a 5-6 days! Immediately she stopped using her diaper, even at night. I finally accepted that this was for real, and the diapers are gone, she hasn't even had one accident in the whole experience. I'm still a bit in shock, wasn't I supposed to plant the idea, read the books, get her excited??? Was she really ready to grow up before I knew it???? No, this will not be the last time I get blind sided.

(when you've got to go....)

I love so many things about this stage, the total belief in oneself being one of the best. Although it can be difficult "self" is one of my favorite words. When Natalie says that it expresses so much. Her belief in herself, her desire to do the things we do, her need to learn. It takes patients to step back, to respect her when she says "self" and then charges forward. I'm so blessed that we are rarely in a hurry, that I have the time to let her try. On the other side is the heart breaking moments when I hear "can't do it"... oh, no no no, yes you can. I guess in either situation I get to be a parent, a mother who can support her.

No one could have expressed to me the joys of motherhood... and I know there is so much more ahead of me. But I'm not in a hurry... could someone please make time go a little slower? There are days when Nathan says that he doesn't want to get bigger, that he wants to stay this size. I want to say "okay", but a morbid thought crosses my mind and I can't even play along. I just want to live each of these moments and miss them like crazy when they're gone.

My heart is so full of love, we contemplate having another child but I am so afraid that I won't be enough. That I won't be able to re-establish the balance that we have in our life. That sounds funny to read, as we are so far out of balance right now. I know I felt the same way as we were getting pregnant with Natalie. I know in the end it will all be as it should, I just have no idea how we will decide. Nothing is better than the life I live, and I know more children will only add to that. If our family is already complete then I am blessed and fulfilled.

One of those moments

This is just one of those moments I was so glad to capture. The kids actually obliged me when I said "wait a minute" and ran for the camera... then they hammed it up. Trever was at work, I really meant to send this picture to him. Who couldn't miss those kiddos?

PS. This picture shows the end of the rash that Nathan had on his cheeks due to a viral infection (we got blood taken today to see if we could determine if it was Mono).
This is typical Natalie... she's in PJ's (it's probably late afternoon but she rarely wants out of them) and she's sittin' on the potty. Love that girl. She has done SO AWESOME with the potty training. Only a few accidents and she even sleeps without a diaper. Although she is definitely trying to work the system, as she gets into bed she says "potty! potty!". I'm on to her, I just tell her she can go in the morning when she wakes up. Chalk up a win for me (have to take credit for those since she is often a step ahead of me).

Mother's Day

I told Trever that I had finally figured out the perfect Mother's Day. For right now it would be waking up to a clean house, having the house magically stay clean most of the day (some clutter would be fine, but then it would be cleaned up without my labor or prompting), all meals would be decided and made by someone else (or I could make the decisions and *help* with prep the day before, and really I love to cook, so maybe he could just clean up and watch the kids). The kids could spend part of the morning going for a walk with my parents as is the tradition. I could use that time to sleep, read, take a bath. Then we would go for some type of family walk that afternoon. Right now I'm adding that it would probably be nice to cuddle and watch a movie with Trev at the end of the day ... when of course the dishes were already done.

Trever's response? So, you're saying we need a house cleaner, baby sitter and take out?? I love that man. This obviously wasn't the year to get my wish list, especially since Trever wasn't even home until late morning and my parents were out of town most of the day. But I am married to the most amazing man and I know that he will make every effort to always make Mother's Day very special. He is so nurturing of me as a woman and supportive of me as a mom.

In the end it really doesn't matter to me how we spend the day and how messy the house stays. I feel honored as a mother every day... with love from Nathan, Natalie and Trever. It's so common to hear Nathan say "Do you know I love you and like you?" or "I love you and like you all of the time", and that does not diminish how special I feel when I hear those words.

This is what happens when a Daddy is on the playground with the kids. Really??? I have a hard time imagining the mom that helps her son climb onto the top of the roof of the play structure. I'm so glad that Trever is around to give his influence.

I know this picture went into a different post.. but I felt it deserved another glance. I love that girl. She is so full of love and giggles. I read recently that a second child (and any thereafter) fills the space that is left open. Nathan is more serious... Natalie is definitely more playful. She LOVES to cuddle, is chatty when Nathan isn't around, wants to be a dare devil, and generally fills our hearts with her energy and emotion.


Although Natalie will play with dolls, and we thought for a short time that she really liked them, she is definitely a car, truck and train girl. Using her whole hand to push away her hair is something I will miss seeing when she grows up.

My buddy, my "partner". Trever asks him to help take care of Mommy and Natalie when he is away. Nathan takes this job very seriously, Nathan really takes all guidelines seriously. He is so proud of himself when he is able to do something to take care of us, and I just want to explode with my joy and pride. I hope we are raising a man, one who knows how to show respect and compassion, who can stand up for what is right, who honors God, one who believes it is "manly" to give love and joy.

I love where we live.

I suddenly understand why Trever thinks a jean jacket is so cute. She is growing into a little girl so quickly!!

We ended the day with dinner at my parents house. The house was fairly clean, and I didn't think much about the meals. Even in our crazy stage of life, Trever still meets my needs. Have I mentioned how much I love that man???

A day at Gagi and Papo's

Our future gardener
There is always some time for cuddling
And working with Papo
Planting lots of strawberries
We don't have strict clothing regulations in the country... cool enough for a coat but not pants??

Toys R Us

It's easy for my to admit, taking the kids to Toys R Us would never have been a choice for me. Just go to Toys R Us and hang out??? Who does that? Who risks the battle? It's all what you make of it. And my husband has no fear. He's a kid in a man's body. It sounded like a great idea for a play date on a rainy day. So a couple years ago (or maybe only one) we went there for nothing more than play time. And I must say, it went smoothly. It has gone smoothly every time we have gone (more than I can remember, I've even gotten used to it). I have grown to appreciate that our kids get to see so many things, and they don't throw a fit for us to buy something. It wasn't until recently that I think they even knew that we could buy something. Our famous words of influence? "If you're a good listener then we'll come back another day". So now when we go and Nathan wants to buy something we say "well, why don't you find some things that you can do to earn some money and then you can come back to get that". Lucky for us he only asks for simple things, and we make it easy for him to earn $$. If something costs $1, then he has to earn 4 quarters. If it costs $5 then he has to earn 5 $1's. I'm sure someday he'll catch on to this and we'll have to adjust. For now we appreciate how proud he is to earn money and make a purchase.

On our last trip I took a moment to appreciate how cute it is to watch my family walk together. It's fair to take a moment to point out that Natalie is in her "jammies". She would be in them every minute of every day if I let her. Which I do, sometimes.

If you drive by and see our car in the parking lot, you'll probably find us right here, at the train table. It's always the first and longest stop. Then it's off to the toys you can ride.

Bubble gun fun

Every once in a while a gift comes into our lives that is pure joy. Auntie Melodie nailed it with the bubble gun! The kids LOVE to play with bubbles, and this toy allowed them to have fun together. I even remember some good sharing going on!
If you have noticed that my kids always have dirty faces, don't worry, I've noticed it too. Life is too short to avoid the camera because I haven't wiped their faces. Although I would be lying if I didn't admit that I wish there was a little fairy who would come by and wipe them clean so I could take pictures without acknowledging this short coming of mine. I'm over it though... this is the way we live... play time and snacks and pictures. I have enough clean faced pictures to remember what they look like in 20 years.

Can you feel my heart melting???

Maybe they were finding shapes in the clouds? Whatever it was, the moment was full of love for all of us!

Easter dinner

Easter was a long holiday weekend for us this year, filled with so many wonderful experiences. The best part was helping Nathan to understand that all the celebrations were in honor of God. There is a lot more to explain to him as time goes on, but he is solid on the basics. He knows, and fully believes, that God made each of us just the way we are. It's very touching. And sometimes humorous. "Mommy, look at that purple car. Why is it purple? Is it because God made it that way?". "Yes Nathan, I suppose God did make it that way", sometimes I clarify and say that God gave us the choice to make it that way. But mostly I figure he has a lifetime ahead of him to get the specifics.

I've decided that I could give up the focus on candy that seems to overwhelm all holidays, but I wouldn't give up the time with friends and family.

Natalie knows where the good stuff is, she's a great "helper!"


We were so grateful for the guests who enhanced our Easter dinner. We always enjoy our time with the Spencers, and this year we were so excited that Amy and her mom joined us! It was so exciting that Amy wanted to join us even though Mike is in Australia. And what a treat to meet her mom!

Easter Egg Hunt at Charlie's Safari

Every holiday continues to be more fun. Quite simply, kids enhance the experiences of life. To see the excitement and wonder expressed on their faces is wonderful. LOVE IT!!!

Best friends!

Nathan is growing so quickly. He was so excited to see the Easter bunny! (makes me more excited for Disneyland!) Last year we could not get Natalie away from the Easter bunny, this year we couldn't get her near him. :)

Our darling girl being coached through her egg hunt. So glad Daddy is a prepared egg hunter! He always has an egg in pocket to throw down in front of the kids (no broken hearts in his presence!).

Natalie was happy with the first egg, she just wanted the candy. It hasn't started to compute: more eggs = more candy.

Nathan graciously gave up eggs to the younger kids (honestly!)... he definitely exceeded the limit.


Getting a tatoo... just like his Papa!

Gagi's happy place, with a grandchild in her arms.

Dena is 33!

Was it Dena's 30th that we had those great shirts??? I might have to find a picture to add to this blog.

Could we have a celebration for Dena and not have a great time? Happy Birthday my beautiful friend, thanks for giving us a reason to celebrate our love for you AND show off our dancing skills!

Easter Egg Fun

What a fun impromptu get together! The Riccobene's and the Duerr's came over for some egg dying fun. I still have the dye in the crack of my table... we live in a state of priorities, and lifting that heavy glass to clean up has not hit the top of the list. We're moving soon, we'll get to it. ;)

A rare moment... Trever and me in a picture together! See, we really do love each other! Nathan sometimes asks, "can we go to Daddy's house?". So sad, but that will change someday soon.
Because what easter egg doesn't deserve some red sprinkles?

Darling girls! Anna Duerr and Gianna Riccobene, Natalie's future partners in crime and fashion!
Natalie remembers the big kids eating in this area on the floor when it was her birthday, she was quick to head down there for dinner. So many signs that she is watching and excited to be "big".
The finished products. I'm so thankful for friends that are willing to throw things together, unplanned and not really prepared. We asked Vinny to run to the store for more vinegar, in true form he came back with two bottles! Love that guy! I'm so thankful that my kids are surrounded by wonderful "cousins" (including those that weren't here for this occasion).